Entitled Snob Threatens To Take Away Server's Tip If Service Isn't Up To Par On First Date

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abbyadler
Feb 1, 2022 2:00 PM EST

First dates rarely go as planned. We make assumptions about the person we're going out with in our heads and imagine how the night is going to go based on what we know about them. The truth is we know nothing until we know something. Sometimes that thing that we learn within the first hour of the date isn't to our liking. In today's 'Am I The A$$hole?' post, there was a major red flag at the beginning of OP's first date with a total snob that she met on a dating app. When the server arrived at their table, OP's date put $15 on the table and rudely informed her that the more she messes up, the less of a tip she was going to receive. OP was appalled but remained silent about his embarrassing behavior. The waitress became flustered and ended up messing up under the pressure. Scroll down to see how OP handled her date's total first date faux pas. 

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  • 01
    Font - AITA for tipping our waitress 20 dollars despite her poor service, because my date was playing a "game" with her tips? I met a guy on a dating app, we hit it off and we arranged for our first date. Things were going well, we had sat down and had started some small chat. Our waitress comes over asking us what we want to order.
    via u/throwaway000059

    OP's first mistake was believing that the first date was going well. We generally find that something goes wrong on the first date. If he doesn't show his true colors within the first ten minutes, just wait and see. 

  • 02
    Human body - I say what I want and gesture to him so he can order. He orders and then pulls what I think is about 15 dollars on the table. He says "This is your tip. Everytime you mess up, I take some away".
    via u/throwaway000059

    Welp, there it is, ladies and gents. The first and only red flag OP needed in order to leave the date then and there. However, OP was too nice to leave from the get-go, so she had to see her snobby date decrease the poor server's tip for the rest of the night. 

  • 03
    Font - The waitress looked nervous immediately. I'm sitting there a bit shocked, but mostly embarrassed because I wasn't expecting this. She must have been new as well, because she did spill some drinks on our table that night, gave us the wrong food, and overall just seemed lost. He took away 13 dollars.
    via u/throwaway000059
  • 04
    Head - I asked him why he thought doing tips this way was a good idea. He said it was the best way to ensure "good service". When I disagreed he said "Cant always be nice to these people, it's not a respectable job".
    via u/throwaway000059
  • 05
    Human body - I decided then that I wanted nothing to do with him, and called the waitress over to get the bill. I slapped a 20 dollar bill in her hand and got up to pay for my own meal.
    via u/throwaway000059
  • 06
    Font - Later that night he had demanded to know why I had given her the tip despite her poor service and I told him it's because he decided to treat her livelihood like it was a game. He said because of me she'll never improve her service and that I'm just a people pleaser.
    via u/throwaway000059
  • 07
    Human body - I blocked him, but I've wondered ever since if that was really the right thing to do. AITA?
    via u/throwaway000059
  • 08
    Font - throwaway000059 · 9 hr. ago If I was a server and someone pulled this shit with me I'd probably give them bad service on purpose for being ad khead. $15 isn't even a great tip. NTA, obviously.
    via u/RenDabs
  • 09
    Font - HerosMuse · 10 hr. ago NTA. That kind of game isn't even remotely a good way to "ensure good service" it's a good way to fluster your server into making even more mistakes cause they're too hyper aware that they're being judged.
    via u/HerosMuse
  • 10
    Human body - hopelesscaribou · 9 hr. ago Or make a really good server deliberately and subtly ruin every part of your dining experience.
    via u/hopelesscaribou
  • 11
    Font - blackbirdbluebird17 · 9 hr. ago Hell yeah. If anyone had ever pulled that with me back in my serving days I guarantee they would have gotten stank eye and the most glacial-but-technical service possible. My self-respect is worth more than your $15.
    via u/blackbirdbluebird17
  • 12
    Font - synesthesiah · 10 hr. ago Asshole Enthusiast [9] NTA. That kind of "game" is only played by rude folk who have no respect for those they deem "below" them. That poor waitstaff didn't deserve to be treated like trash because of her job, because she was new, because she's human and not a perfectly functioning robot. Kindness is free.
    via u/synesthesiah

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first date aita entitled dating apps karen
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